That means when they write "The new Audi advertisements stick you in the eye," I have to change it to something that suggests attracting attention more than retinal assault. It also means I have to change the order of things sometimes. Like when they list Li-Ning's top NBA endorsers in monthly press releases:
LI NING today expand international market presence with teamwork of worldwide
renowned NBA superstar: Chuck Hayes, Damon Jones and the Shaq.
Even if you want to believe Chuck Hayes is "worldwide renowned" (uhh... what?), you have to give "the Shaq" primacy on that list. Damon Jones is having a rough time even finding a suitor in free agency, and I think Chuck Hayes just ended up as like 9th on the depth chart in Detroit. The Diesel is the only person on that list even close to "international" in terms of popularity. Jones only scored 2.4 poings per game more than I did in the playoffs last year, and I was battling planar fasciitis. If you're a non-NBA fan, you're probably asking yourself: "So why would the Chinese Nike want to sign such low-caliber players?" But if you follow basketball, you already know. It's because Jones was a swingman in Miami next to "the Shaq" and in Cleveland next to (the?) Lebron. Chuck Hayes was pulling down boards next to Yao Ming, who is apparently pretty popular among the rice-eating sectors of the sportswear market. It's actually a pretty clever strategy: Lebron makes hundreds of millions in endorsements because he attracts so much attention, but you can sign a mediocre player on the Cavaliers' roster for about 4 wontons and some poison dog food. Add that to the fact that lots of Lebron fans will inadvertently be watching his teammates anyway and you have quite the bargain.
Think of how far this could go: are we only years away from seeing Ichiro's batboy get a 4-figure contract from a Japanese brand like Onitsuka Tiger? Could we be months away from seeing Li-Ning billboards that use a definite article in front of Shaq? Maybe not, because as we just saw with Hayes and Jones, companies can get screwed big-time. Damon Jones can't even find a job, and you know there's no Chinese fanbase in Detroit because Asians aren't legal there yet.
China-Related Links of the Day: One of these is true, and the other is a joke article from the Onion. Take a guess from the headlines and click through to see if you're right. It's actually pretty hard.
No comments:
Post a Comment